


Not Enough

by SilverMoon53



Category: The Gifted (TV 2017)
Genre: Alternate Universe - Canon Divergence, Angst, Cauterization, Gen, Gunshot Wounds, Hurt/Comfort, Lauren Whump, Medical Inaccuracies, Whump, i was going to apologize for that but lbr, if youre reading this its for the angst not the medical stuff, improper use of cauterization, probably inaccurate descriptions of gunshot wounds
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-04-14
Updated: 2018-04-14
Packaged: 2019-04-22 15:28:42
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,833
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/14311722
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/SilverMoon53/pseuds/SilverMoon53
Summary: Lauren messed up. She didn’t manage to close the first portal in time. That’s not going to stop her from helping the others, though.AU - Lauren didn't close the portal fast enough in episode two, about 13 minutes in





	Not Enough

**Author's Note:**

> Lauren needs more love and by love I mean suffering. She's really protective of everyone and someone suggested this au on tumblr so I kinda ran with it. Have fun!

It was just a hunch. She had no idea if it would work or not, but she had to try. Her family was in danger; she couldn’t let anything happen to them.

The two men who had brought them there (John and Marcos, some distant part of her mind said) were standing, looking ready to fight. Lauren had no idea how much use they would be against the gun being raised towards them, though. And even if they could fight the people on the other side of the portal off, then what? The portal would still be there, and more people would come.

No. The only solution was to close the portal. 

Not taking her eyes of the man with the gun, Lauren sped over until there was nothing between herself and the portal. She didn’t give herself time to think, just raised her hands and _pushed_. She felt the portal like it was a physical object, pushing back against the air she manipulated. It didn’t want to close and Lauren wasn’t sure she could make it.

“Lauren! What are you doing?!” Andy shouted from behind her. She could hear his fear, his panic, and knew that if she didn’t do this, he could get hurt. 

“Watch out!” her mom yelled, desperate, but Lauren ignored her. She couldn’t let her family get hurt, not if there was something she could do about it. She put everything she had into pushing the air around the portal. 

With one final shove, it closed.

Too late.

The bullet tore through her arm with a force that would have made her gasp if she had breath to spare. As it was, she turned with the jerk and fell to her knees, ears ringing painfully from the gunshot. The pain followed a second later and she bit back a scream.

Her brain worked rapidly, trying to assess the damage. The others hadn’t seemed to notice yet, still shocked that Lauren had managed to close the portal, but that wouldn’t last. Already, her adrenaline was fading and thoughts turning sluggish in the letdown. 

_Think!_ she commanded herself. _If mom knows I’m hurt, there’s no way she’ll let me keep closing the portals if Clarice makes more. If I don’t close the portals, then we’re in big trouble._ Lauren grunted, steadying herself as she swayed. _I can’t let them know,_ she decided. 

“Lauren!” Suddenly, her mom was beside her, fussing. Lauren slapped her hand over where her arm hurt, hoping there was little enough blood that she could keep it hidden. “Are you okay?” 

“Dude, what did you just do?” Andy asked from somewhere behind her. Lauren shut her eyes tight, trying to concentrate over the murmur of the mutants behind her and her mother’s anxious babbling. 

“Mom, get off, I’m fine,” Lauren said, pushing her off. 

“Your arm, are you hurt?”

“Uh, I think I pulled a muscle,” she said, thinking quickly. “I’m fine.” She still didn’t know how badly she was bleeding, but from the searing pain, she knew she was. 

“Caitlin,” John’s strong voice cut through the confusion and Lauren let out a soft breath as her mother’s attention was pulled away from her. “If we get you that medicine, can you help her?” 

“You can’t just buy hypercortisone-D at Walgreens,” Caitlin scoffed. The adults kept talking, but Lauren ignored them. 

Still keeping pressure on her arm, she scooted back until she was resting against the wall of lockers. Lauren was bleeding now, she was sure of it. There was no heavy gushing, so the bullet must have missed her major arteries, but she could feel the warm blood flowing through her fingers. 

“-whatever it is you just did?” It took Lauren a second to realise Marcos was talking to her, then another to piece together what he meant. 

“Yeah,” she said softly, “I think so.” 

In truth, she wasn’t sure. She had never strained her powers like that, and with the injury in her arm, she would have less control. What Lauren did know, however, was that these people needed her to do something only she could do and that she was not in the habit of letting people down. 

A flurry of motion followed her words. Hasty goodbyes were said as Marcos and Caitlin headed out, and as John and the redheaded woman started trying to repair the damage. Lauren let her head fall back against the wall, and forced herself to breathe deeply. The attention was away from her again, and would be for long enough for her to assess the damage to her arm. 

Stealing her nerve, Lauren opened her eyes and removed her hand. 

The bullet had struck just under halfway down to her elbow, tearing easily through the flesh of her bicep. It was on the outside, so Lauren had to twist slightly to get a good look at it. The wound was more ragged than she was expecting, looking almost like an animal had grabbed a small chunk of her flesh, with the surrounding area already bruising an ugly purple. Then again, Lauren was no expert in what bullet wounds look like. She thought this one might classify as a graze and not a flesh wound, if only just. Her nerves were on fire, pain radiating from the area in time with the rapid pulse of her heart. Feeling queasy from the sight, she slapped her arm over it again and jumped when she heard her brother’s voice.

“You’re hurt.” Andy sounded scared, no longer in awe of her ability. 

“‘m fine,” Lauren slurred, startled by how weak her own voice sounded. She cleared her throat and tried to swallow, but her mouth was dry. “I’m fine,” she ground out, but her brother looked far from convinced. 

“I’m going to get some-”

“No!” Lauren grabbed her brother’s arm with her good hand, holding him in place. “I’m the only one who can close the portals. If anyone finds out I’m hurt, they won’t let me and that can’t happen. Please,” she begged, eyes boring into his. Andy tensed, then relaxed slightly. 

“Okay,” he said. “At least let me get you a bandage.” He ran off before she could say thank you. Exhausted and hurt, Lauren laid her head back against the wall again and closed her eyes. 

***

Lauren opened her eyes to find herself tucked under a blanket. She could hear her brother talking to someone a few feet away and bit back a whine as pain flared up in her arm again. Grimacing, she pulled the blanket down to check her wound. It was wrapped tightly in what looked like a red-brown strip of cloth. She looked closer, and realized that the side that was closer to her chest was white, which meant…

Lauren swore under her breath from pain and frustration. She was still bleeding, and quite heavily from the looks of it. Her arm alternated between feeling numb and like it was on fire, and her neck ached from sleeping against the wall. Looking around her, Lauren spotted a bottle of water and a jacket, both presumably left by her brother after he had wrapped her arm up. 

Greedily, Lauren grabbed the bottle and gulped half of it down. As she did, she wondered if Andy had wrapped her arm himself or if he had asked for help. Putting the lid back on the bottle, she glanced over to Andy and John again, trying to catch her brother’s eye. She did, and he gave her a tiny nod, almost unnoticeable, and Lauren relaxed. He hadn’t told anyone. Andy started talking a bit more animatly to John, and Lauren took the opportunity to put the jacket on to cover up her arm. 

A hiss escaped her lips when she shifted her arm, pain once again sparking through her. Tears slid down her face and she shook, grinding her teeth hard enough that her jaw ached. Then the jacket was on and she could breathe again. Carefully, she used her good arm to maneuver her hand into the pocket so she wouldn’t have to hold the weight. 

Slowly, Lauren pushed herself up, leaning heavily on the wall for support. The room grayed out at the edges of her vision, then swam back into focus. Legs wobbling slightly, Lauren made her way over to the table where Clarice lay. Lauren opened her mouth to greet the others when Clarice stiffened, then started flailing around. John was on his feet instantly, shouting orders while Lauren spun around, looking for the portal. 

Disoriented, Lauren felt her legs buckle but was stopped from falling by her brother. He turned her to the portal as John shouted “Lauren? You got this?” over the chaos. 

She nodded, and shrugged Andy off. With one arm, she grabbed the air around the portal and pulled. 

It didn’t work.

This portal was stronger than the last.

This portal didn’t want to close. 

Without thinking, Lauren pulled her injured arm up and doubled her force. A scream ripped itself from her lips, equal parts pain and strain. She could the wound on her arm pulse angrily, any scabbing that had closed it ripping open again. All she could focus on was closing the portal. At the edge of her awearness, Lauren could pick up several things that she couldn’t quite piece together.

A siren.

A gun, raising to meet her.

Someone screaming.

A bright light, visible despite eyes shut tight.

A gust of wind. 

Then she was pushing against nothing and the sudden lack of resistance let her crumple to the floor. 

***

She woke sooner this time, just seconds after hitting the floor. 

“‘m fine, ‘m okay,” she muttered. Andy was above her, yelling her name, panicking. Lauren was fine. She had to be. “‘m okay,” she repeated, trying to push herself up. Her arm gave beneath her and she crashed down again. The ringing noise was back with a vengeance, so loud now that it almost hurt. Lauren strained to hear through it, struggled to stay afloat in the swirling room. 

“Stay down,” someone was telling her, a deep voice that reminded her of her father. “What happened?” Lauren squeezed her eyes shut and tried to speak, tongue heavy in her mouth.

“She got -” Andy started, but Lauren summoned her strength to cut him off.

“Haven’t used-” she broke off for a moment, panting - “m’ powers that much. Tired.” She tried to stare Andy down, tell him not to let anyone know she’d been shot, but he wouldn’t meet her gaze. To Lauren’s immense relief, John either bought it or was too distracted to care. 

“I have to talk to Sonya,” he said. “Shout if anything happens.” He ran off without another word, leaving the siblings alone with Clarice, who had fallen still once more. In the following silence, Lauren managed to sit up and drag herself to the wall. She leaned heavily against it, wanting to lie down but feeling like she had to stay awake in case Clarice opened another portal. Andy watched her, still standing where he had when she woke up. 

“Lauren…” Andy began after a pause. 

“Andy, no.” Already Lauren was feeling stronger, able to push the pain down once more. “I’m the only one who can close the portals.” Stronger was not well, and she coughed. The movement shocked her body and sent pain shooting through her once more, but she pushed on. “I’ll be okay.” 

Andy hesitated, then let out a deep sigh. “I’m not going to change your mind on this, am I?” he asked. He stood up, grabbed her the water bottle and blanket and sat down beside her. 

“No,” she said firmly. “They need me.”

“Yeah, well, mom’s going to kill you when she gets back. Then kill me for not getting you help.” 

They both chuckled softly at that and Lauren smiled, thankful that her brother had settled down on her left side and couldn’t see the growing red stain on her right sleeve. 

***

The next portal came sooner than the last. 

Lauren was up and moving towards it before she even knew what was happening, but was forced to stop halfway there to lean against the wall when the world turned black. By the time the ringing faded enough to hear again, John was shouting to evacuate and Andy was beside her again. On her right side this time.

“Lauren, your arm! You can’t-”

She ignored him. Ignored the pain in her arm, the screams around her, all of the chaos. On the other side of the portal, the police had gotten backup and a big truck with “SWAT” on the side had people spilling out of it. With a yell, she reached into the air around the portal and pulled with all her might. 

It didn’t budge. 

Her brother shook her, trying to pull her to safety.

She pushed harder.

Her throat ached from screaming.

She pushed harder. 

The portal began to close, ever so slightly.

She pushed harder.

Lauren could feel blood dripping down her arm but she pushed harder and harder, she had to close the portal or more people would get hurt, she had to, she had to, she had-

The portal wrenched itself open with enough force to send Lauren flying backwards into the wall. Her back hit first, knocking the air from her lungs and leaving her completely unprepared for her head to smash against the wall a split second later. 

She landed hard on the floor, eyes blinded by tears and the creeping blackness that heralded unconsciousness. Her ears were filled with violent ringing and screams of refugees just underneath. 

Lauren struggled to stand - _have to close the portal have to save Andy have to have to have to_ \- but her arm was completely useless and her lungs were empty and she was so dizzy she couldn’t tell which way was up, let alone which way the portal was. 

Andy was screaming something. His words were muffled and indistinguishable, but his familiar voice cut through the fog and Lauren latched onto it. She felt someone grab her good arm and help her up, pulling her somewhere. Andy sounded far away but as Lauren’s vision slowly cleared, she saw it was him pulling her out of the building. 

As soon as she realized their direction, she started to resist. “No,” she said, trying and failing to wrench herself from her brother’s grasp. “I have to get back. I have to close the portal.” She pulled again and found herself on the ground, unable to remember falling. 

“Lauren, please!” Andy begged, still sounding far away. 

All around them was disaster. Dozens of portals had opened up, and a strong wind blew through them in all directions. Mutants ran about, trying to escape, trying to grab their few possessions, their children, their siblings. All this damage, all this pain, Lauren blamed on herself. If she had been faster, if she had been stronger, better, she could have stopped this. 

Lauren knew her brother was right, that there was nothing more they could do and that they needed to get to safety. But the stress her body had gone through suddenly caught up and she could barely move. 

Andy was yelling again, this time for help. Then there was another pair of arms around her, this one less mindful of her wound. Lauren caught a glance of orange hair as her brother and his helper dragged her outside of the building. 

She fluttered in and out of consciousness, snippets of reality forcing their way through to her. 

A child screaming for his mother.

A sudden flash of light as another portal opened in front of them.

A dog’s panicked barking.

The sound of punches landing.

A gunshot, followed instantly by a scream of pain.

Terrified faces.

Then she was outside, or the roof had been torn off, because she could see the sky. The ground still rumbled with running feet, the air still filled with screaming and crying, but Lauren at least was still. For a second of peace, all she could see was the blue sky above, detached from all of the pain and panic as if she was floating above it all. 

She was pulled back when two new voices joined the chorus. One was familiar, reminding her of childhood scraped knees and kissed owies. Lauren struggled to focus, to stay afloat in this world of pain so she could help, but only managed to pick up pieces. 

“-my daughter!”

“-elp Clari-” 

“-nly way to stop-”

“-lot of blood-”

It took Lauren a few seconds to realise that her mother’s voice could no longer be heard. She felt a whimper escape her lips upon the realisation, wanting desperately to be held and told everything would be okay. 

Then there was a face in front of hers, and someone was holding her down and a hand shoved something into her mouth. She tried to spit it out, tried to fight the blackness threatening to overwhelm her, tried to do something, _anything_ to help with the chaos, but was distracted by a bright light. 

“-going to hurt,” someone warned her. The light got closer and closer until she felt it touch her arm.

Her flesh boiled and Lauren screamed, finally surrendering herself to the darkness. 

***

Lauren was awake, although her eyes were still closed. She wasn’t quite sure how long she had been awake, or asleep for that matter, but she couldn’t hear people running or screaming anymore so she assumed a fair amount of time had passed. 

The soft sounds of people sleeping was all she could hear, and there was no bright light pushing against her eyelids. Lauren licked her lips, tongue feeling thick and heavy. She tried to lift her arms to rub her eyes, only to find that her right arm was strapped tightly to her body. 

All at once, memories flooded back. 

Lauren’s eyes flew open and she sat up, causing the world to lurch around her. She spun her head around, trying to get her bearings. All she managed to do was lose her balance and fall back onto the bed, causing the IV stand attached to her left arm to fall to the floor with a loud clatter. 

The noise shattered the still night and sent pain pulsing through her head as a startled shout echoed back.

“WhashappenIwasntsleeping!” 

Lauren realised her eyes were closed again and opened them to her brother’s face hanging nervously over hers. “Lauren?” he asked, “Can you hear me?” She opened her mouth to reply but choked on her dry tongue and started coughing. Andy disappeared and returned with a bottle of water, which he helped guide to her thirsty lips. 

“What happened?” Lauren croaked as soon as she was done drinking. “Is everyone okay?” 

“You got shot.”

“I remember that much. Is everyone okay?” she repeated. She tried to sit up and look around, but Andy pushed her back down.

“You and Clarice were the only ones who got hurt.”

“Is she-”

“She’s okay. She’s resting, right there.” Andy nodded to his left and Lauren let out a breath. “Mom got back in time with the meds, managed to help her before she tore the whole building apart. John says you’re the only reason we managed to hold out so long. Mom says she’s going to skin you alive when you wake up.”

“That mad, huh?” Lauren chuckled weakly, but the sound died quickly when Andy didn’t join in. His young face was drawn tightly in, eye glistening in the dim light. “What’s wrong?” she asked. 

“You almost died,” he whispered. 

“Andy, I’m okay. You don’t need to-”

“No!” His voice sounded like a shout in the quiet of the night. Hands clenched in tight fists, his jaw worked angrily as he tried to find words. Lauren could feel the room start to shake but said nothing, afraid of making things worse. “You almost _died!_ ” he repeated. “Mom said you were in hypo-gla-something, or whatever. If Marcos hadn’t been there, you would have bled out! You almost did anyway.” 

“Andy, what- what are you talking about? What does Marcos have to do with this?” 

Andy inhaled sharply and the rumbling cut off. He looked away and ducked down to grab something from under the bed. “Mom said to change your bandage when you woke up. Give me your arm.” 

Wordlessly, she moved to obey, then remembered that her arm was strapped to her body still. Instead, Lauren shuffled up until she was leaning against the wall at the head of her bed. With a gentleness she didn’t know he possessed, Andy carefully undid the knots and eased her arm from its bandages. 

“You might not want to look,” he warned. 

She did anyway.

And immediately regretted it. 

The last she had seen her wound, it had been simple, if groteske. A chunk of flesh ripped from her arm, leaving ragged flesh and a dark bruise. Now, it was dark, burned. The surrounding area was red with burns and blisters, the wound itself the dark gray of burned flesh. 

Air left her lungs and the world swayed around her, and she was suddenly so very glad she was sitting. Lauren shut her eyes tightly and turned her head away, hissing in pain as the cool night air touched the ruined skin. 

“Marcos had to cauterize it, or whatever,” Andy explained once she was bandaged up again. “Mom threw a fit as soon as she had Clarice stable, but agreed that he probably saved your life by doing that. Then mom turned on me, so thanks for that. I’m not to leave your side until you’re better _or else_.” He rolled his eyes. “Just don’t expect me to wait on you hand and foot. You’re the one who didn’t want help.”

Lauren smiled, glad to see her brother back to his snarky self. She pulled herself away from the wall to lay down properly again, feeling all the pain and exhaustion catch up. “How long was I out?”

“About half a day? Depends what time it is now, I guess. Clarice has woken up a few times, she’s worried about you, but she’s okay.” Andy hesitated for a second, then continued. “I was- I mean mom was really worried about you, too. She’ll be glad to know you woke up, though. I should go get her.” He stood up, but looked uncertain. Lauren smiled softly at him.

“Stay,” she said. “Let her sleep. She needs her rest.” Andy nodded and settled back down. Lauren could feel him watching her as she closed her eyes, tired. Just before she fell back asleep, Andy spoke up again.

“Hey, Lauren?”

“Mhm?”

“Can you promise me something?”

“That depends entirely on what that something is.”

“Har har.” A pause. “Promise you won’t leave. Promise you’ll stay with me.” Another moment of silence. “Please?”

“Don’t worry,” Lauren said as she drifted off to sleep, “I’m not going anywhere.”

**Author's Note:**

> Find me on tumblr https://cloudcoveronclearnights.tumblr.com/ or on Discord: cloudcover#7167 Feel free to send me a message and just start talking!


End file.
